Helping Your Child Overcome Back to School Stress
By Brook Pauley
Social Counselor
There is no doubt about it - going back to school is stressful for students, parents and even teachers. This stress is unavoidable, but there are things you can do to help make the transition smoother.
Before you tackle the stress, it is important to think about the source of it. There are many things your child might be worried about. To start, Covid-19 has completely changed the landscape of our entire world, and school is no different. Your child may be worried about contracting the virus or unsure of how to protect themselves. Your child may also be concerned about the social landscape at school: relationships with peers or teachers, or how to make and keep friends. Particularly in Middle School, students may be concerned about body changes, acne, getting braces, or weight changes. Finally, one of the most significant worries I see Branksome Hall Asia students struggle with is academic pressure. Some of my students are so concerned that they will not get the “right grade,” they make themselves unwell.
This list may sound daunting, but there are many things you can do as a parent to support your child. This list is an adaptation of an article from VeryWellFamily.com with some additional tips from The American Institute of Stress (links are below).
- Help your child become familiar with the routine at school. Review their schedule with them the night before school. Make sure you understand the school rules and discuss them with your child. Sometimes students need help with organization, so take a peek at their binders and notebooks and offer assistance. Finally, if your child is worried about COVID-19, remind them of our cleaning and safety procedures.
- Remind your child that he or she is not alone. Many other students are probably feeling the same anxieties. Encourage your child to talk with their friends about their concerns.
- Listen and be fully present with your child. For me, I focus so that I am not distracted and I put away my electronic devices when communicating with my students. I encourage you to make a “No Phone Zone” or “Tech Free” time and spend that time engaging with your child.
- Create routines and include unscheduled time. Getting a good breakfast in the morning is essential to start the day off right. After school, it is important for students to have some unstructured time. Smaller children, especially, need time to play for proper brain development. Older children need unstructured time so they can rest and be refreshed for the next day. Our brains are not meant for constant studying and work.
- Remind your child that you care about them and love them, no matter what grades they earn.
I hope these tips are helpful to you and your child as we begin the school year.
It is important to remember that sometimes children (especially younger children) may not be able to verbalize their anxieties, so here are some signs to watch for from VeryWellFamily.com:
- Being more clingy than normal
- Being restless and fidgety
- Complaining of stomach aches
- A change in eating and sleeping patterns
- Expressing negative thoughts or worries
- Getting upset or angry more quickly
- Bouts of unexplained crying
- Struggling to concentrate
If your child displays signs of anxiety for more than two weeks, reach out to your school counselor, doctor or psychiatrist. Your BHA school counselors have a list of therapists, doctors and psychiatrists that we can recommend to help.
On behalf of the counseling team, I wish you a peaceful beginning to the school year. Please feel free to reach out to us with any questions.
- Yeojin Ahn, JK Prep-G5 (yeojinahn@branksome.asia)
- Pauline Li, G7, 9, 11, 12 (A-K) and all Chinese students (paulineli@branksome.asia)
- Brook Pauley, G6, 8, 10 and 12 (L-Z) (brookpauley@branksome.asia)